(no subject)
Nov. 9th, 2015 07:49 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
paradoxPeople are often interested in how my husband copes with having a wife who is mentally ill. He’s pretty quick to reassure him he’s fine, that it’s not a problem, that they shouldn’t worry about him but about helping me. There are, of course, moments of difficulty (like having to plan and change plans to go out, as per the whims of my anxiety) but he manages them the same way anyone who loves someone copes with the fickle winds of fate. He tries to be compassionate and flexible, and saves his eye-rolling and face-palming for moments when they won’t add to my stress.
But I think the key is that we check in regularly.
One of the gifts of my battle with depression and anxiety is that I’ve learned the benefits of self-care, and how it’s as useful to have a regular mental health checkup as it is a physical. Am I experiencing stress or distress? How does it affect me? What tools do I have to manage it? Are there any warning signs to which I should pay attention? How can I minimize the stress and effects as much as possible?
So hubby and I talk about this often. He helps me with my mental health, and I help him right back. It’s hard in the same ways normal stuff is hard - you know; managing finances, planning trips away, compromising on TV shows, taking turns doing chores, looking out for each other.
So really it’s not that hard at all. It’s life. And that’s a much better option than the alternative.
But I think the key is that we check in regularly.
One of the gifts of my battle with depression and anxiety is that I’ve learned the benefits of self-care, and how it’s as useful to have a regular mental health checkup as it is a physical. Am I experiencing stress or distress? How does it affect me? What tools do I have to manage it? Are there any warning signs to which I should pay attention? How can I minimize the stress and effects as much as possible?
So hubby and I talk about this often. He helps me with my mental health, and I help him right back. It’s hard in the same ways normal stuff is hard - you know; managing finances, planning trips away, compromising on TV shows, taking turns doing chores, looking out for each other.
So really it’s not that hard at all. It’s life. And that’s a much better option than the alternative.